


Fast Food in a Fruits Basket

by haruka



Category: Fruits Basket
Genre: Fruits Basket - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-03-15
Updated: 2004-03-15
Packaged: 2017-10-03 09:23:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/haruka/pseuds/haruka
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chaos ensues when the Jyuunishi members stop at a fast food restaurant.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fast Food in a Fruits Basket

Fast Food in a Fruits Basket

By Haruka (haruka@ymail.com)

\--

Akito had called for the Juunishi members to gather at the hot springs run by Ritsu's parents. After the weekend was over, Akito and Kureno were remaining behind for an extra few days, but the other eleven (plus Kyo the Cat) headed back home together in a rented bus.

They decided to stop and eat along the way, and thus began a nightmare for the poor, unsuspecting staff of a fast food restaurant ….

\--

"YAY!" Momiji cried as he bounded into the restaurant. "I'm starving!"

"Kagura, will you let GO of me?!" Kyo insisted as the dark-haired girl half-dragged him through the door.

"But I want you to _order_ for me, Kyo-kun! It would be so romantic!"

"I don't WANT to be romantic, I just want to eat!"

"Guten tag!" Momiji greeted the cashier enthusiastically. "We're all together -- there's a bunch of us coming in. I have a question! I'm really hungry and would like a salad, but do you have big ones? And does your salad have chicken in it?"

The cashier looked from Momiji to the steady stream of people who were continuing to flow through the entrance. "Um, it can, if you want it. There are large salads with chicken."

"Great! Now what to drink …?" The little blonde looked thoughtfully at the menu board.

Ritsu followed Kyo and Kagura with his head bowed, his long hair falling forward to hide his face.

"I seriously question the health of anyone who eats here," Hatori said as he came next, with Shigure close behind.

Shigure chuckled. "Oh, stop thinking like a doctor."

"I was referring to _mental_ health," Hatori replied with a sigh. "Whose idea was it to come here again?"

"Some of the kids asked to stop -- we didn't get to eat yet today what with getting packed and they're hungry." Shigure grinned and nodded toward the cashier. "Do you think she's still in high school?"

"We're here to get food, not dates."

"Dates _are_ food," Hiro informed him as he pushed his way past the two adults, bringing Kisa with him by the hand. "Move it, Ritsu!"

The crossdresser leaped aside. "Gomen nasai, Hiro-kun! I didn't mean to dawdle and block the path! Please forgive --"

"Ritsu, relax," Hatori said with a hand on his shoulder. "They're already gone."

Hiro had brought Kisa up front, passing Kyo and Kagura and finally pushing in front of Momiji. "Out of the way, Rabbit!" he ordered. "Kisa-chan orders first."

"I already started ordering," Momiji retorted, then winked at Kisa. "I'll be quick like a bunny, okay?"

She giggled and Hiro gave Momiji a black look.

"Doesn't this place have fish at all?" Kyo was frowning at the menu board.

"Did you hear me, Kyo-kuuun?" Kagura whined. "I said I wanted a hamburger. Could you tell them?"

"Tell them yourself. Hey, maybe THAT'S fish -- nah, it's chicken. Not that I don't like chicken, but --"

"All right, Yuki-kun, here we are!" Ayame swirled into the restaurant, preceding the teenager who tried to look as though he didn't know him. "As your dedicated big brother, I will make sure to provide you with a healthy, yet satisfying meal --"

"Then what are we doing _here_," Yuki replied under his breath. He felt a tug on the back of his shirt and looked over his shoulder at Hatsuharu.

"Yuki, can you just order me something that looks good? I'm going to the bathroom."

"Sure," Yuki replied, and Hatsuharu squeezed around he and the adults to head off toward the dining area, eyes searching.

"I've got my order in, Ha'ri!" Momiji waved back to Hatori.

"Go sit in the dining room then," Hatori told him.

Kyo turned to the cashier. "Okay, I've got it --"

"Hey, I said Kisa-chan was next!" Hiro protested. "And then that stupid Rabbit butted in --!"

"I was here before you were, so shut up," Kyo told him and continued with his order, "I'll have that taco combo -- the third picture there." He started to move away, but Kagura yanked on his arm again.

"Kyo-kun, you didn't order for _me_ yet!"

"WAIT a minute!" Hiro exploded.

"Oh, yeah," Kyo said and lowered his voice to the cashier. "See that guy back there?" He jerked his head toward Yuki. "He's violently allergic to cheese, so if he orders anything with cheese, make sure to take it off. And don't mention it to him or he'll give you an argument -- he doesn't know what's good for him."

Kagura stared at him. "But Yun-chan LOVES -- mmmph!"

Kyo covered the dark-haired girl's mouth. "She'll have a hamburger combo, thanks."

Kagura's eyes shone with little hearts and she pulled Kyo's hand off her mouth, blushing. "You ordered for me, Kyo-kun! How romantic of you!" She giggled and gave him a little teasing push that propelled him half-way across the restaurant.

"Hope she puts him through the wall," Hiro muttered, then his expression softened as he looked at the girl next to him. "Kisa-chan, what would you like?"

Further behind them, Hatori looked toward Shigure. "We should have tried to organize this a little better. That poor cashier looks frazzled already."

"It's going fine, Ha-san!" Shigure said cheerfully. "Three of the kids have ordered and it looks like the little ones are doing so now -- hey, wasn't Ritchan next in line?" He looked around. "Aya, did you see Ritsu?"

"Yes, he's behind me." Ayame pointed over his shoulder and Shigure saw that Ritsu was indeed there.

"Ritchan, you were ahead of us before," Shigure said curiously. "What happened?"

Ritsu looked up, his cheeks turning pink from embarrassment. "I thought it would be better if I let you go first. Gomen nasai."

"You don't have to apolo -- oh, never mind." He faced front again. "So, what are we going to have, Ha-san?"

"After eating here, indigestion at the least, a heart attack more likely."

The server called out an order and Momiji came bounding over. "That's mine!" he declared, taking the tray. "Thank you!"

"Momiji, be careful," Hatori warned. "Running causes _accidents_," he added significantly.

"Don't worry, I will be!" Momiji headed off into the dining area at a slower pace.

While Hatori ordered and Shigure flirted with the disinterested cashier, Yuki tried to tune out Ayame as he debated the merit of the menu.

"I'm not sure you should have that. It's deep-fried."

"_Everything_ here is deep-fried, Niisan," Yuki replied through gritted teeth.

"The salad isn't."

"Out of my way!" Hiro ordered, elbowing between them. "Our tray is ready and Kisa-chan is waiting!"

"I can have better salad at home from my own garden," Yuki told Ayame, ignoring Hiro, who pushed past them again as he left with the tray. "Right now, I just want that extra-cheese burrito."

"Well … all right!" Ayame relented, hugging Yuki's shoulders. "Whatever my Yuki wants he can have!" He bowed to the cashier with a flourish. "My beautiful little brother will have the extra-cheese burrito and I'll have some onion rings."

The cashier looked up as if an alarm had gone off. "The extra-cheese burrito? Ummm, okay." She anxiously punched some buttons on her register, then skittered off to murmur something to the person on the taco side of the kitchen before returning.

Yuki was staring at Ayame. "You worried about ME eating deep-fried food and you're having onion rings?"

"It's too late for me, but you still have a chance at good health," Ayame declared.

"Yeah, right," Yuki muttered. "You'll outlive us all. By the way, Hatsuharu wanted me to order for him, so just get him one of those chicken sandwich combos." He looked around, frowning. "He's been gone a long time."

Back at the entrance, the last Souma through the door, Rin, watched with a frown as Ritsu moved around to get behind her. "What are you doing?" she asked in annoyance.

"Gomen nasai! You haven't ordered yet, Rin-san, and I thought you might want to go ahead of me …."

"I don't want to eat anything here. Do what you want." She turned on her heel and walked back out the exit. With no one else to hide behind, Ritsu slowly made his way toward the counter.

"Kagura, let go of me!" Kyo yelled. "Our food is ready -- I gotta go get it!"

Yuki saw the server waiting to give Kyo his tray and noticed the Mexican fries piled with cheese, sour cream, and vegetables. There was a sprinkling of green onions on top. He motioned to the server and whispered, "You'd better get extra green onions on that -- he can't get enough of them, and if there aren't plenty, he'll complain loud enough for the whole restaurant to hear."

The server looked nervous enough that he went back and loaded on extra green onions. Yuki smiled to himself.

Kyo managed to shrug his way out of Kagura's grip and hurried to the counter only to find himself next to Yuki. They both snorted and looked away, then Kyo saw his tray. "What the hell is THAT all over my fries?!"

"Extra green onion," the server said and pointed at Yuki. "He said you'd want them."

Kyo turned on Yuki. "You bastard! I hope you enjoy your cheese-free burrito!"

"What?!" Yuki's eyes widened as his own tray was put before him. The burrito appeared a lot thinner than in the picture. He glared at Kyo and the two boys looked about to jump each other before Hatori got between them.

"Both of you act your age instead of Hiro's. Take your trays and go eat. Ayame, your food is on Yuki's tray, please go with him."

"Of course, Tori-san! Come along, Yuki, I'll feed you!"

Kyo stomped off with his tray, muttering about how Kagura might trade her fries for his.

"I can feed myself!" Yuki was snapping at Ayame. He glared down at the burrito. "Not that there's much left to eat!" He surveyed the dining room and saw no sign of Hatsuharu. "Great, he must have gotten lost again."

"Ha-san!" Shigure tried to get Hatori's attention as the family doctor warily watched Kyo and Yuki to their tables. "Our food is ready, too."

Hatori then noticed Ritsu hovering just behind them. "Did you order yet?"

He shook his head. "Gomen nasai, Hatori-niisan."

Shigure sighed and gave the tray to Hatori, then took Ritsu by the shoulders and steered him toward the cashier. "Go sit down, Ha-san -- we'll be there eventually!"

"We're still missing Rin," Hatori looked around but didn't see the long-haired girl until Hatsuharu came through the entrance, pulling her along with him. "Weren't you already in here?" he asked the boy.

"I took a wrong turn and ended up going out a back door," he said. "I found Rin about to drive off in the bus and thought I'd better bring her in here."

"Spoilsport," Rin growled.

"Ha-ri!" Momiji waved from a booth. "Better hurry, there aren't many places left!"

A little girl from another family ran toward the condiment rack just as Yuki went back to retrieve a straw. They collided. The Souma family members watched in horror as an explosion of coloured smoke revealed a small grey rat peering up at the girl with beady purple eyes.

"Mommy, look!" she said in delight. "A rat!"

"RAT?!" the non-Juunishi customers and restaurant staff all repeated in horror.

Chaos ensued. All of the customers who were not from the Souma family ran out the door without bringing what was left of their food, yelling threats about alerting the Board of Health. The store manager was already on the phone, calling an exterminator in a panic while the cashier grabbed a broom and was coming out to do the rat bodily harm.

Shigure scooped the rat up and shoved him into his pocket. "You know what, Ha-san? I think we'd better get some bags and take all this food out after all, don't you?"

"Yes, I do," Hatori said and motioned to the seated family members. "Come on, kids."

"I can't breathe!" Yuki's muffled voice came from Shigure's pocket.

"Rin and Ritsu don't have food yet," Hatsuharu pointed out.

"Gomen nasai!" Ritsu whimpered.

"Doesn't matter, we'll share ours, come on!" Shigure pushed Ritsu toward the door.

"Let me out of here, you pervert dog!" Yuki yelled as loudly as his little rat voice would allow from within the depths of Shigure's pocket.

"Thank you for serving us!" Shigure waved to the staff, ignoring Yuki. "It was a pleasure!"

"For whom?!" Yuki demanded, trying to scramble out of the pocket only to have Shigure poke his head back down with a finger.

"Ha'ri!" Momiji jogged up behind him as the other Souma kids followed the adults out. "How about we stop at the ice cream store after this for dessert?"

"Only if they have a drive-thru."

\--

(2004)

Fruits Basket belongs to Natsuki Takaya.

This fic is not to be re-posted.


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